How to Stay in Touch After You All Leave Home

Last summer my mom said: “We need to stay in touch better. I’ve been feeling disconnected.”

Remember when you and your siblings all lived at home under the same roof? Remember how you knew everything about each other? I never really thought there would come a day when I didn’t know all the details of my sibling’s lives.

IMG_7889_2I mean, we spent a lot of time together. Oink.

But it happened. We five siblings left for college, missionary service, and marriage.

Including my parents, we are now in four different states across the country.

The Professor’s family is in five different states and not all in the same country!

We read each other’s blogs and Facebook updates, but it isn’t quite the same as a nitty gritty written update about kitchen appliances and how potty training is really going.

And so, last summer, we began a family newsletter.

This happened around the same time I was listening to a Gretchen Rubin podcast. Apparently, her family has been doing this for years. And if Gretchen says it’s a good habit, it is!

We have two rules:

  1. It’s okay to be boring
  2. It’s okay to be short

We’ve been going strong for a year.

Every Sunday we write a little update of what happened during the week, and while no one is actually in charge of kicking off the weekly email, it always gets started by someone.

I tell you what, it’s been even more fantastic than I thought it would be. Surprisingly, family updates are never boring, and they’re rarely short. Once you start writing, you keep writing. And what’s boring to you (grocery shopping with twins), is fascinating to your siblings and parents.

There have been no downsides. On the contrary, we look forward to it every week. We know what’s going on with each other. We are as close as we’ve ever been. That is due, in large part, because we have made a conscious effort to stay in touch. We still text and call, but the weekly newsletter has been even more bonding.

Letter writing art. And while we don’t use a quill and scroll (maybe we should?), I save all the emails in an email file entitled “Journal.” Personalities come through in a different way when writing. Funny stories are shared, and sad ones too. With two deaths in the family this year, it was actually painful to start writing again. But it was also the best shared therapy we could have had.

Sometimes Brynne, my 12-year-old writes the newsletter. Here’s one of my favorites:

Makechnie Newsletter by Brynne

     The Makechnie family had a great week. Cope was made student leader, Nelson is enjoying lacrosse, and Brynne and Paige both recited poems at their school for poetry night. Both of them did a great job and now have this coming week off from school. They are going to do many “fun” things, such as orthodontist appointments, cleaning, yard work, walking the dog, going through clothes, and taking out the garbage. 

       Up in NH we are enjoying the weather! Although some of the weather has been bad, most of it has been warm and sunny, and this week the weather is going to be lovely. Today J-A-Y came to church with the Makechnie family! We think he enjoyed it, but if he didn’t he was too polite to tell us that. Cope had other drama this week too. In Vocal Ensemble she fainted. Amy thinks she was just tired. It was quite dramatic, and Cope narrowly avoided throwing up on Jay’s shoes! That would have been terrible! Happy Passover!

Donations are what keep this newsletter running!!!

Ha. Brynne will give you the real dirt!

The day will come, when the darlings leave us.

It could be by boat:IMG_2400

Or a Ford truck:IMG_7009

Someday, my fab four won’t live under the same roof or swim in the same ocean:IMG_2052So. We must stay in touch!

Write to one another. Every week. Because you can. I can guarantee, you won’t regret it!

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4 thoughts on “How to Stay in Touch After You All Leave Home

  1. Herb

    Thanks, Amy. As you know, I am making a feeble attempt each week to transcribe our Ukrainian adventures. I am always uplifted whenever I read your posts. Have a wonderful rest of the summer. Life is way too short!

    Reply

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